Stupid Ningen Customs

Part One

"Gyaaaaaagh!"
Kurama started awake, clutching at his shoulder.

"Kurama! What's wrong with you?" Hiei's eyes were wide and concerned--with a hint of guilt. "I just tapped you..."

Kurama gave a rueful grin and massaged his shoulder. "It's not you, Hiei, it's been hurting for a while." He blinked and rubbed his eyes, then his eyes widened as he noticed the sunlight streaming in through the window. "Masaka... what time is it? ... No!!" his face fell into an expression of despair. "No!" he pounded the desk in front of him with his fist. "I fell asleep!"
Kurama groaned, covering his face in his hands as tears of frustration welled up in his eyes.

Hiei laid a comforting hand on his back. "You needed to sleep, fox, it's been days since you got more than an hour. You'll kill yourself if you keep this up..."
Kurama looked up at him with a pained expression. "You don't understand, Hiei," he sniffed, wiping at his eyes. "I was supposed to finish all this paperwork by today..." he gestured to several piles of disordered forms littered over his desk. "And I've been behind for weeks..."

Hiei's expression hardened. "Well, you're not going to work today, or the rest of the week."
"What?" Kurama asked, bewildered.
Hiei folded his arms across his chest and fixed his lover with a cold glare. "I said, you're not going anywhere, until you've recovered."
"Hiei--ow!" Kurama winced at a cramp in his leg as he tried to stand up and flopped back into his chair. "I can't stay home, Hiei," he continued, trying hard to sound sincere. "I--" he twitched and clapped a hand to the back of his neck. "I'm way too far behind..."

"Look at you, Kurama!" Hiei growled. "You're falling apart! How can you do this to yourself for some stupid ningen job?!"
"It's for my father, Hiei!"
"He's--!" With a considerable effort, the fire demon clamped his jaw shut around his next comment. He struggled a moment with his face, then settled into a confident smirk.
"Besides," Hiei said. "They're not expecting you at work for a while..."
"But..." Apprehensive suspicion clouded the Youko's face. "Why?"
"I called them and told them not to." the Koorime replied smugly, and turned to leave the room.

"NANI?!" Kurama yelped, grabbing Hiei's arm before he could go. "You called my office?!"
Hiei turned back to him, his face grave. "Yes. I merely told them that I was your lover, and I thought you were exhausted from overwork."
Kurama's eyes nearly popped out of his head. "You... You didn't..." Incredulous horror spread over his face.
Hiei regarded him solemnly for a moment, then cracked an evil grin. "Of course I didn't, baka. I said I was your doctor."

Kurama glared balefully at Hiei, who smiled innocently back. Slowly, he hoisted himself upright. "Look, Hiei--" he tried and failed to stifle a yawn. "I appreciate the thought but--" he broke off to yawn again. "I've got to get to work and--"
Hiei reached out one foot and swept Kurama's legs out from under him. He hoisted the redhead easily, despite the significant difference in their heights.
"Hiei..." Kurama protested, but his eyelids were sagging. He yawned again. The little Koorime carried him out of the study where he had been spending his life the last few weeks.

Kurama's arms draped around Hiei's neck, and he nestled his face against his chest, still mumbling incoherently about work. Finally, the words died down and his breathing became slow and regular. His fingers curled in Hiei's scarf, and he made a small, contented sound, snuggling closer.

A small, unguarded smile escaped Hiei's defenses and stole across his face. "Stupid fox," he whispered gently, toeing the bedroom door open. He laid his sleeping lover down carefully on their bed and pulled the blankets up over him. Kurama curled up gratefully into a little ball, pulling the covers into a tight coccoon around him.

Hiei made for the door, pausing to glance back at the blissfully slumbering Kurama. He frowned, shaking his head. "Stupid ningen customs... Hn." He closed the door silently behind him.

Kurama sniffed and rolled over, hugging his pillow. He sniffed again, eyes still shut. "Kaasan..." he muttered, then sat abruptly upright as he realized it couldn't be her. What was that smell? He couldn't quite place it, but it smelled good!

Kurama gave a sudden, panicked squeal and glanced desperately at his bedside clock. "Twelve-thirty..." he groaned. But he felt so much better for six hours' sleep. He stretched lazily. Maybe it wouldn't kill him to take just one day off from work...

The door eased open and Hiei's head poked in.
"Hn. You're awake."
"Mm." Kurama assented, trying to look stern. "No thanks to you. I was supposed to be at work hours ago."
Hiei scowled darkly and kicked the door the rest of the way open.

Kurama gaped openly at the tray in Hiei's hands. The smell he had detected earlier wafted enticingly from it. "Hiei--! You cooked...?!"
"Baka." Hiei grumbled, laying the tray on Kurama's lap. "What do you think I ate in the Makai? Grass, maybe?"
"Well, no, I... I guess I never really thought about it... Is this--" he glanced at the steaming plate of food. "--for me?"
"No." Hiei crossed his arms. "It's for the youkai next to you." He glared at the redhead. "Go on, eat it. You'll die if you keep up this 'coffee-and-toast' nonsense."

Kurama smiled at this display of concern. "Thanks, Hiei. It looks, er..." he raised an eyebrow at the concoction on his plate. "...interesting..." he hesitated, spoon in hand.
Hiei growled. "Am I going to have to feed it to you?"
Kurama grinned at the idea, then hastily dug in as Hiei took a menacing step forward.
"Hey!" Kurama exclaimed, taking another bite. "This is pretty good!"
"Don't have to sound so surprised..." Hiei grumbled, but his face radiated pleasure. Kurama began to eat in earnest. He hadn't realized just how hungry he was.
"No, really..." Kurama continued, between bites. "This is... *gulp* ...great... where'd you... *munch* learn to... make this? ... And what... *gulp*... is it?"

"There's this large bird in the Makai--the Wokoma--about the size of one of your Ningenkai chickens, only airborn, and really fast. Hard to catch... for most youkai." he smirked. "The sauce is mine... mostly Makai herbs." The fire demon sat down on a chair across from his lover, looking immensely pleased with himself.

Kurama quickly polished off the... Wokoma... and drank the orange juice on the tray. He smiled to himself... Makai bird and orange juice... well, why not? And it meant Hiei had finally deigned to use the refrigerator... a ningen contraption that the little fire demon disapproved of.

Kurama set the empty tray on his nightstand and gave a satisfied sigh, leaning back into the pillows. "Arigatou, Hiei, that was really thoughtful."
"Hn. I'm not done yet," the Koorime said, rising to stand by Kurama. "Come on, fox." He gave him his hand to help him up.

"Oh!" Kurama exclaimed delightedly as he spotted the bathtub.
"Take your clothes off, fox," Hiei commanded, moving to inspect the tub. The water had gotten cold. The fire demon dipped a finger in and the water immediately began to steam.
"Ready, Kurama?" Hiei turned, running appreciative eyes over his lover's form. Kurama had grown taller--much to Hiei's original consternation--and slightly broader than he had been as a teenager, but that slender, delicate beauty which captivated the Koorime had never changed. "Get in."

Kurama tested the water with his toe and hissed. "It's hot."
"That's the point." Hiei said. "Go on."
Kurama looked as if he was about to protest, but changed his mind. Slowly he stepped in with first one foot, then the other.
"All the way." Hiei insisted.
"I am, I am!" Kurama replied hastily. "I'm not as used to the heat as you are, you know!" He eased himself gingerly down until he was submerged up to his neck. His crimson hair floated out around him in a halo.

The Youko sighed slightly, leaning back. It'd been a long while since he'd had the time for a bath rather than a quick shower. He opened his eyes and smiled at Hiei. "What else do you have planned?"
"Hn." Hiei reached into a pocket and drew out a small pouch. "I got this at a bazaar in the Makai," he said. "Supposed to be good for sore muscles and that kinda thing."
Kurama raised an eyebrow. "'Got it'?"
The Koorime shrugged. "Got, stole, what's the difference?" Pulling the drawstring, he poured the contents into the water.
The water fizzled a bit where the powder had disappeared, then a swath of lavendar bubbles broke the surface. Kurama giggled as the water began to bubble everywhere. "It's like seltzer water," Kurama grinned, squirming a little.

"Is it working?" Hiei asked, examining a handful of bubbles quizzically.
"I don't know," Kurama replied. "I guess you're supposed to soak for a while."
"OK," Hiei said. The fire-demon grabbed a bottle of shampoo from the bathtub rim and squirted a generous amount into his palm.
"What are you--" Kurama began suspiciously. "Agh! Hiei!" Kurama sputtered indignantly as he was thoroughly splashed. Hiei seized his head and worked up a vigorous lather, working it throughout the entire crimson mass. Seeing he wasn't going to get away, Kurama relaxed and enjoyed the scalp massage he was getting, clamping his eyes shut to avoid the suds.

"This is quite a job, isn't it?" Hiei said wonderingly, applying another squirt of shampoo and working on the redhead's sidelocks.
"Don't forget the conditioner," Kurama cracked, forgetting to look cross.
"Hold your breath."
Kurama obeyed quickly as a cupful of water cascaded over his head. Hiei grinned as Kurama peered out at him through drenched red locks. "You look like a drowned rat."
"Why you--!"
"Ah, ah ah..." Hiei caught Kuama's hands before he could splash him and started in on them with a washcloth. Kurama blinked then gave his lover a lascivious grin.
"You gonna wash me... all over?"
"Hn." Hiei replied, returning him an equally mischievous look. "Stupid fox."

"Ah... Oh, Hiei... nnh... Harder..."
"Che, fox! You've got so many knots in your back, I can't tell where your bones are!"
"I know... ahhh... that's it, right there... under the shoulder-blade... ohhh... that feels great..."
"How did you get like this, Kurama?" Hiei asked, digging his fingers into the rock-hard clump of muscle at the base of his partner's neck.
"Oww...no, don't stop, Hiei. I don't know. I guess it's caused by stress..."
"Gods know you've got enough of that to knot every back in the Makai and still have some left over for yourself."
"Mmh." Kurama replied, not really listening.
"It's all because of that ningen job of yours," Hiei continued, scowling at a particularly nasty knot near the kitsune's waist.
"Mm-hmh," Kurama mumbled, sighing happily.
"You should quit and save your mind and body a lot of trouble."
"Mrph," Kurama agreed dreamily.

"Hmm..." Hiei said, tired of being so articulate. He returned his concentration to his lover's body. The hot bath was supposed to have relaxed his muscles, and the herbal oil that glistened all over the Youko's skin claimed to be yet another relaxant. And still Hiei felt like he was massaging a slab of granite.

Hiei was seized with an intriguing idea. Worth a try, he thought, and began channelling some of his fire-ki into his hands.

Kurama moaned softly as Hiei's fingers dug deeper into the corded muscle running up his sides, shifting to allow him better access to his shoulders. Hiei's hands moved upward, applying heat and pressure. Kurama made various sleepily delighted sounds as the tension beneath his skin seemed finally to melt at Hiei's touch.

"Oh, bless you, Hiei," Kurama gasped into the pillow, moaning again appreciatively as a particularly painful ache at the joining of his shoulder and upper arm dissolved.

Hiei ran his hands down Kurama's arms and massaged his palms and fingers, paying special attention to the knuckle joints. Moving back up, he passed over the kitsune's entire back again, just to be sure, then moved further down. He kneaded the fox's behind, then moved down to his tautly stretched thigh muscles, the clenched tendons of his calves, and finally his feet.

Hiei leaned up and flipped Kurama onto his back. The Youko smiled up at him, green eyes half-lidded and sparkling.
"Well, how do you feel now?" Hiei asked, his expression serious.
"Marvellous," Kurama replied dreamily, his eyes drifting shut. "And sleepy."
"Sleep then, you need it." Hiei sighed. So much for convincing him to take a vacation... at least for now.

The fire-demon made to leave but was suddenly tightly encircled by Kurama's arms. Before he could think, he was clamped tightly to the Youko's chest.
"Don't think you're getting away after that, koibito," Kurama purred, seizing Hiei's head and kissing him deeply. Hiei smiled slightly as Kurama broke the kiss and leaned back. He was about to bring up Kurama's job again, deliver an ultimatum, when he noticed that the fox's eyes had slid shut again and his breathing had become very slow and regular. "Kuso," he hissed.

Hiei tried to struggle out of Kurama's embrace, but it was no use; the Youko had a death-grip on him. "Baka. How can you be asleep and still be so stubborn?" He writhed a bit more and was greeted by a low growl from the kitsune. Hiei huffed and allowed his body to go slack. The sleeping Kurama gathered him up more tightly and snuggled his face up to his chest. Resignedly, Hiei pulled the sheets over them both.

I've won one day, Hiei thought, settling down more comfortably in his lover's arms. Tomorrow, kitsune, I'll win the rest!" Placing a possessive kiss on Kurama's lips, he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.

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